I am thankful people are forgiving. Sometimes I leap before I look and I end up somewhere I didn't want to be. I have to work on being less sensitive. I have to work on making myself happy before anyone else. I have to learn that if someone doesn't like me, it's not an ill reflection on myself, but them.
I love Doug so much, latley work has been stressing him out more than usual. It makes me feel helpless because I can't do anything. I still feel very lucky for being with him. Russell texted me the other day. It happens from time to time, usually he breaks up with his current girlfriend and feels lonely so he texts me, and asks if I want to hang out. Since I've been with Doug, I have no intent on ever hanging out with him again. I have no attraction towards him whatsoever, in fact quite the opposite. Now every time he contacts me, I just remember who he used to be and how much he hurt me, and how many years of my life I wasted on someone who probably never cared about me as much as they said they did.
I could never go back to something like that after having what I have now. I've never been treated this way by a boy. I have never felt so cared about and loved. Like I'm the only one. It's amazing, and right now it's one of the only good things I have in my life. I am so thankful for finding Doug, not only because he treats me so well, but he's shown me that true love isn't something made-up in a story, it's real, and it's hard to find, but when you do find it, it;s the best thing in the world.
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